Peter Jackson Dishes on Accidentally Killing The Last Known Hobbit


Lord of the Rings fans, eat your heart out: Acclaimed director Peter Jackson paid a visit to Really Late Night set to open up about the time he accidentally killed the last known hobbit.

Tolkien enthusiasts have speculated for years about the mysterious death of Blumby Noggins, the last known hobbit in existence, who worked as a consulting producer on Jackson’s The Fellowship of the Ring. Now, thanks to RLN, we finally know:

“I sat on him,” Jackson admitted to Matt. “He perished — and his species perished with him.”

“Guess he couldn’t handle the preShire,” said Matt, who was booed.

Jackson said that while killing Blumby was an accident, he doesn’t completely regret it: “Blumby was a cruel hobbit and difficult to work with,” the director explains. “He insisted we depict hobbits with massive crotch bulges in the film. Fortunately, that cut of the film died with Blumby after I sat on him.”

Before Matt could ask any follow up questions, Jackson abruptly stormed off the RLN set. A spokesperson later explained that Jackson is currently being hunted by Andy Serkis and cannot show his face for too long.

RLN will no longer feature guests associated with Lord of the Rings, as Matt has rededicated his life to finding “the Blumby cut.”

Written by Ryan Kushner. Ryan is a total Capricorn and will leave his camera off during a zoom call as an intentional power move.

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